Free eBook - How to Find a Good Thai Wife in Thailand (Pt 15)
Found a Girl?
Once you find a girl you are interested in – and that is interested in you, what next?
Dating in Isaan is a bit tricky. Traditional Thais will tell you – there is no dating. If you’re seen out with their daughter – you’re getting married. You’re already dating and that is that. I have narrowly avoided some close calls related to this. Of course you want to date the girl first – and see if she is the ideal match for you, before you get engaged or married.
First you’ll ask her to dinner or lunch. Her friend may accompany you, or if you have a translator, great, she can be the chaperon. Dinner may lead to an overnight at your room, but probably it won’t. Multiple dinners – may not. That’s traditional Thai style. If the girl is totally in love with you in a matter of days, she’ll probably sleep with you – but, I wouldn’t count on it for some weeks or more.
As you spend more time with your chosen girl, you’ll start to see whether she is right for you or not. If she is not right – don’t string her along, because she may get irate. Just cut all communication with her – and move on. You cannot date multiple girls in Ubon, the city, though large – is too small as far as gossip is concerned, and you might find yourself in deep shi* if you try to be Don Juan Ubon.
Dating Sites to Use
Thai Love Links (www.Thailovelinks.com) is the most recent Thai dating site that is doing well. It’s a paid site, but they have a lot of members.
Thai Dating HQ – Thai Girls Headquarters (www.ThaiDatingHQ.com) is a free site, and gradually building momentum. Worth joining.
Badoo (Badoo.com) – another free site, and they have a lot of members, but I found very few in Ubon – as is the usual with dating services online because Ubon girls don’t speak English well, they definitely don’t read and write it well enough to complete the online forms.
More About Meeting Thai women…
You know why most guys coming from overseas meet and fall for a Thai bargirl – and marry her?
1. Is around.
2. Speaks English to any degree.
3. Shows him any attention without him having to go out of his way.
You can see this for yourself when you arrive… or, if you’re a frequent visitor to Thailand, you’ve already seen it for yourself. Foreign guys gravitate toward bargirls because they’re easy to pick up. Easy to date. Easy to talk into marriage because they’re looking for a way out of the industry (presumably).
Most guys hunt for their Thai wives in one of three places:
2. Patong Beach
3. Patpong District of Bangkok
It does take more effort to meet good Thai girls – no doubt. If you happen to be young, good looking, and charming – and under 45 say, you won’t have any problem whatsoever in finding eligible girls. They’ll find you – just like back in your home country. Most of us don’t have one or more of those qualities, so we have to work a little bit to find a girl that will consider us for marriage. In Thailand too.
When I came to Thailand I was 38 years old and rather outgoing. I wouldn’t call myself overly handsome, or ugly, but somewhere in the middle. I was smiling a lot more than I do now – and I met probably 100 girls each month, that were willing to go out with me – or that showed interest in me beyond just a regular conversation.
Now, some years later, I’ve stopped smiling nearly so much. I have a wife and children and I don’t need to find anyone to jump into bed with. I’m not looking for a 2nd wife. I’m quite happy and so not as flirty as I once was in Thailand. As a result I meet far fewer women who give me the hint that they would like to take it further than friendship. Far, far fewer. In the last five years maybe I’ve met about 5 such women.
The difference is not my age so much. It isn’t my looks. It is my attitude. My lack of smiles, my lack of looking and making eye contact with girls and smiling that has slowed it all down. The whole key to meeting women in Thailand is smiling and making eye contact. Really, that’s it. If you’re not doing it – you’re not giving yourself half the chance you could have.
Just like in your home country, the weekend is the prime time for meeting women. The reason is – they are ready to meet people once the weekend rolls around. Personally, I think Thais are ready to meet you anytime, but, I notice a definite change come the weekend. I notice a lot more women looking around – away from who they are with. They’re looking for guys when the weekend comes to Thailand. Really. I’m 100% sure I see this change on Friday afternoon and it lasts through Sunday. I think best times are Friday and Saturday for meeting girls in Thailand. Maybe it’s the same worldwide – I’ve not been to enough countries to be able to speak with authority on the subject. But Thailand? Absolutely.
So don’t waste your time on the weekend. Make sure you are out in public as much as possible and meeting people whenever possible.
Don’t forget to check your email sometimes to see if anybody wrote you email that you handed your card to. Some Thais are very shy and might only try to contact you like that.
A Final Word… About Urgency
In 30 days you have 90 chances to meet girls during meals. If you eat 4 times per day, you have 120 chances. You’ll be walking a lot – so, eat 4 times per day instead. Eat soup, the rice noodles seem to burn off quickly and you won’t gain weight.
If you hit 3-4 coffee shops per day you have another 90-120 chances to meet women. Go to 30 nightclubs per month. Hit a couple on a night to increase your chances. Go to at least one department store every day – there are many chances to meet girls in Robinsons, YingCharoen, Tesco-Lotus, and Big C, don’t ignore these places. Be prepared to walk a LOT. Start on a training program now from home so you are ready to walk a couple miles during the course of each day you spend in Thailand.
If you can learn to eat som tam, gwit diao, kowl men gai, pad thai, tom yum, yum woonsen, and other Thai favorites – do it! Thais love to see foreigners eating Thai food and often times you’ll be in conversations over it. It happens a lot here.
Exercise nightly at one of the outdoor parks. Walk or sit on the benches – regardless, you’re going to see many, many people – and more importantly, they’ll see you there day after day and wonder why you don’t have a Thai wife. Talk to men and women – men have sisters and daughters that they might want you to know.
If All Else Fails…
We don’t expect anyone to take us up on this offer, and we don’t have time to do it often – but, here it is.
If all else fails and you think you need serious help because you aren’t even close to finding a Thai wife sometime during the course of your 30-days in Thailand, email us at:
We’ll meet you in Ubon and personally find you good Thai women to choose from.
Yes, it will cost you. The fee for this service is 285,000 THB. One of us will stay with you for the next 30 days and help you, daily – to find your Thai bride. We speak Thai well enough to help you with whatever you require, and we know the city inside and out. You won’t need to pay for a translator, pay for a room for us, buy our food for us, or pay anything else for us – it’s all included in the fee.
Of course you still pay your own expenses like hotel, food, and transportation, but we can probably help you save substantially in those areas – if you choose this option.
If you want slower options – that won’t cost as much, there are some…
Teach English - You can volunteer teach at a school just about anywhere in Thailand, and within a few months (of trying) you will probably have met someone to marry. I think if you teach for 6 months or a year in Thailand you will almost certainly meet someone that you could marry. Many teachers do just that. Many female teachers meet Thai men to marry too. You can teach and get paid too – but usually the contract is for one-year. By all means, if you can take a year away from your home country to teach in Thailand – do it.
Start Looking for a Good Job in Thailand – Teaching English will net you some fraction of what you can make back in your home country. There are decent jobs in Bangkok for professionals with major companies – Bangkok is one of the big hubs for Asia. With time and diligence you might be able to find a job making as much money in Bangkok as you do at home. There are plenty of good girls in Bangkok too.
Dating Sites – Some guys meet their future bride on a dating site first, and send dozens of emails back and forth before meeting in Thailand. Some get married afterward. Though I couldn’t see how this could work more than one time in 50, Steve has done just this – and found a lovely wife five years ago on a dating site. So, it is possible. I think it’s safe to say it isn’t probable, and that many of the girls on the dating sites are not what they seem. Some are actually guys – Thai and foreigners alike, that are scheming ways to rip off guys abroad looking for Thai women.
Ok, that’s all we have for you – we hope it helped and you put a plan into action in the next year or so.
Don’t forget to send an email (can be blank) to: FindThaiGirl@gmail.com to get access to all the helpful links like Google maps on Ubon Ratchathani. An auto-responder will send you back the info instantly.
Best of Luck to you on your mission!
Mark & Steve
PS – if there is anything missing in this book and you want us to add it to the guide, do let us know at: FindThaiWife@gmail.com.
Free eBook - How to Find a Good Thai Girl in Thailand (Pt 14)
Ubon Night Clubs, Discos
The Rock â located in the Ubon International Hotel megaplex, formerly known as Nevada Hotel.
e-Bar â part of Laithong Hotel complex on same road as Sapphasit Hospital. Upscale crowd.
U-Bar â university kids and other high-society patrons with money. If youâre not under 40 you will likely feel out of place here, but the live rock music (Thai style) can be quite good.
Swing Party House â this is, without a doubt, one of the sleepiest places in Ubon. The music is mellow. The patrons â more so. They have a sign on the building that Johnny Walker Black is just 999 THB and Red is 599. If thatâs true, this is probably the cheapest place in Ubon for those two drinks.
Darwin at WeLoveUbon.com has a map and more details about Ubonâs nightlife - http://weloveubon.com/ubon-nightlife.html
Ubon Shopping Centers
We love girls working retail becauseâ¦ they must talk to you, itâs their job. That, along with the fact that they really hope you buy something so they score a little commission, makes it one of the ideal places to look for good Thai girls. Often times the girls are hired by a store because they look good. They may not have a degree at all. If a degree is important to you, scoping out the retail shops might not be the best plan of attack.
Tesco / Lotus â found on Chayankul Road on the same side of the street as Ubon International Hotel, but up towards Big C (north).
Big C â opposite side of Chayankul as Ubon International Hotel. Further north than Tesco-Lotus. Go north on Chayangkul Road until you see Soi Chayangkul 22 on your left. Youâll see the signs.
YingCharoen Park â 350 yards from the front of Ubon International Hotel. South on Chayankul Road and West (right) on Ratchathani Road.
Makro â North on Chayankul Road. Pass Big C. Make a right on major highway 231. Go about 1km, on your left is Makro. Makro is a good place to look for women, though not women that are shopping there â but, women that work there. Reason being, Makro is like a Samâs club â a giant warehouse of food that can be bought in bulk. Usually restaurant owners are shopping here, and most are married already.
Robinson Center â this is filled with high-end clothes departments from different designers. There are plenty of women working the retail in this store and they are eager to talk. I have had many good conversations in the store that could have led to more. There are many college graduates that take jobs in retail in Ubon since other jobs are scarce. Itâs either move to Bangkok, or take a lower paying job in retail in Ubon. Many choose to stay in their home town to be closer to family.
Robinson is a great place to go to practice your Thai with the girls working retail. You might also find a great girl there, I knew a few that were gems and that made no attempts to hide the fact that they would go out with me if I wanted. I was already married at the time though.
A word of caution is in order, regarding girls that own their own small business. Usually when bargirls have made enough money and want to escape the industry â and they open a shop of their own, they open a clothes shop, or a hair styling shop. Usually a clothes shop I think. The reason is â they donât really know how to work at all, their previous years of experience working on their back and playing pound the nail in with the round end of a hammer, didnât give them a strong work ethic. They set themselves up in a clothing shop, turn on the television and presto â instant Thai business.
This is not to say that a high percentage of girls you meet that own businesses like this in Ubon were bargirls, but, just giving you the heads up and so you keep it top of mind. Most bargirls in Pattaya come from where? Ubon, Sisaket, and the other northeastern âpoorâ provinces. Thatâs a factâ¦ though I donât know where I learned it, all expats spout that as fact â so we will too!
Fast Food â Foreign Style
McDonaldâs was supposed to be coming to Ubon â but they bailed out after some marketing tests. The nearest McDonaldâs is in Udonthani to your north if you have to have it. Itâs about a 6 hour bus ride.
KFCâs are in the YingCharoen Park, Robinson Center, Lotus, and Big C complexes.
Dairy Queen is at Tesco-Lotus and Big C.
Pizza Company (like Pizza Hut but not quite same) is at Robinson Center.
MKâs is a hotpot restaurant, meaning, you boil your food in the broth on the pot at your table. Itâs quite expensive, but Thais are crazy for it â and will go there if you ask where they want to eat. If you are bringing your girl and her entire family it will cost you a couple of thousand Thai baht. Youâll find this Thai favorite at Big C and Tesco â Lotus.
Best Restaurants to Meet Thai Girls
There are these great little restaurants called âKorean BBQâ. Itâs like an âall you can eatâ place. Usually itâs just 99 Baht and doesnât include drinks. They might charge a lot for water, soft drinks, beer, and ice to make up for it.
Besides the food court at YingCharoen Park, these Korean BBQ places are the best restaurants to meet Thai girls at. Number one, there are large groups of people at them â there might be 100 people eating there at the same time as you. Number 2, you have to go up to the food tables to get your food â and you can meet people up there as you pick through the selection of veggies, meat and seafood. Itâs a good atmosphere, and people are friendly.
BEST in UBON â but, poor place to sit around and drink it. â Dao â Laos coffee.
Black Canyon is located at the Ubon International Hotel. Itâs sort of like Starbucks, but honestly Iâve yet to have a great cup of coffee there â of any style. Everything besides plain coffee tastes like a latte. Unfortunately, itâs the same deal at any of the Starbucks in the country.
Thai Coffee â there are a couple of these places in Ubon, and I havenât had it for years, so I wonât bother telling you where I found them â since the location has probably changed. Youâll know youâve stumbled into one when you see 50 Thais standing in line at a counter to buy plastic baggies full of coffee and ice. The coffee is very strong, and full of sugar and some creme, but Thais love it like no other drink. People are usually in a rush to buy the coffee at these places, having only a few minutes before work or during lunch, so it isnât a great place to meet women.
Free eBook - How to Find a Good Thai Wife in Thailand (Pt 13)
About Foreign Expats You Meet in Ubon
The expats you meet in Ubon are likely to be teachers working at one of the public high schools. There are many such schools offering the English programs, and each school has 1-8 English teachers, usually native English speakers, but also Filipinas that come to teach from the Philippines.
If youâve already been to Thailand before, you know thisâ¦ and you know much of what weâre telling you here in this book, and we apologize for going over even the small points â but, there are many guys reading this book that have never stepped foot in the country. Weâve got to give them all the infoâ¦
Back to the point, expats in Thailand are often dating and married to â ex-prostitutes. Doesnât matter if the expat is teaching, or living in the village, though itâs much more likely if heâs living in the village somewhere in the province of Ubon. To many guys, it makes no difference at all to them that hundreds or thousands of guys paid money to sleep with the girl they married. To each his own. However, since you bought this book and youâre roaming around Ubon and not Pattaya â we have to assume you are looking for a good Thai girl.
Be very cautious â and weâd even say, âDonâtâ, accept offers from a fellow expat to hook you up with a girl that would make a good wife possibility.
See, the problem is going to be thisâ¦
You donât know what type of girl the expat married. She might well be an ex-bargirl. When you start drilling him with questions about the background of the girl he wants to set you up with, it might turn out that yeah, she worked in a bar a year agoâ¦ or yes, itâs the sister of his bargirl wifeâ¦ or something like this.
Get away from that scenarioâ¦ itâs nothing but wasted time, and, youâre going to alienate your new friend if you tell him you donât want to date anyone that could have ever been a bargirl. Itâs happened to both of us â and it can happen to you easily.
Thais tend to eat the same thing day after day, or at least eat in the same couple of places â restaurants outside the workplace. Youâll know a restaurant is cheap and good enough â if you see it packed with Thais. During lunchtime you will see it more than dinner because some people eat at home for dinner. Lunchtime is a free-for-all and everyone is eating out.
There are signs in green with a funny cartoon character on it that say â âGood Food, Good Tasteâ. Sometimes, and usually, restaurants with that sign can be trusted to serve up decent food and itâs probably cooked in a way that wonât get you sick. Maybe Iâve been sick from street stall food three times in seven years. Youâre usually going to be OK. Drink bottled water of course, and the ice is almost always bought from a supplier at a restaurant, so itâs safe as well.
About Spicy Food
âPedtâ without the final âdtâ sound is how Thais say âspicyâ. Spicy in this case means hot â burning spicy, not like salty or sour spice. When you order, you have to make it very clear to the waitress or cook â that you want âmai pedtâ â which means ânot spicyâ. If thatâs what you require. In Isaan â all over Isaan, if you say âmai pedtâ â your food, if itâs usually spicy anyway, will STILL be spicy, but less than theyâd make it for Thais. Emphasize mai, mai, mai pedtâ¦ or say, âMai sai prik, kupâ â which means, âDonât add chili peppers please.â You will get some weird looks if the dish cannot be made without chilis, and sometimes theyâll add them anyway, but itâs worth a shot.
Ask your translator about some dishes that wonât be spicy if you absolutely cannot handle hot spicy food of any sort.
About Buddhist Temples
Thais are Theravada Buddhist. In Isaan going to the temple is still habit for many of them, though there are less going every year, a core group are still going regularly â and this includes women that are of marrying age.
What better place to find a good Thai girl than at a Buddhist temple, right? Sure the bargirls go to make merit for their life of sin, but you will find a lot of great girls at the temple too. If youâre interested in Buddhism at all, start going to a temple in your home country and learn the proper way to act at the temple. There are dress requirements, and ways to do things that wonât come naturally unless you go and learn.
In general, if you are near a monk, make sure your head is lower than his head. Watch Thais do it â they really lower themselves in Isaan. In southern Thailand? Not at all. Tradition is still fairly strong in Isaan, and Thais living there are much more polite than other places in the country. In the south â they have little traditional culture. Bangkok? Little. Another tip is not to walk faster than a monk if youâre both going the same directly. Never ever touch a monkâs head. Really, never touch a monk, there shouldnât be a need to. When you go to the temple, wear pants and full shirt â not sleeveless.
I think the temples are one of the best places to find a good girl â but there arenât enough people at a temple to make it worth going, unless there is an event going on â Buddhist Lent or something else big.
If you see a big event at a temple â go! You will probably meet some good people. Even if you donât meet girls, you will meet families and youâll have given them your business card.
Free eBook - How to Find a Good Thai Wife in Thailand (Pt 12)
Day 3 and Forward
Youâre on your own from this point forward, no sense for us to make up a daily schedule for you to do â you wonât necessarily enjoy doing what we would.
Explore the city more â if there are places listed in this book that you havenât found yet â go find them. Find some favorite places to hang out where you feel comfortable and itâs easy to approach women you see.
What you want to do from this point on is maximize your chances of meeting good girls. That means you have to go out there and do it. Donât sit in your room trying to pull CNN or BBC network on your television, get outside and go experience the city, the culture, the people. You have to really make it imperative that you find a Thai wife during the short time you have to do it.
Some information about places to go to optimize your chance of finding a great girl to marryâ¦
About Exercise in Ubon
There are two main city parks where many hundreds of people go to run, dance, do aerobics, play basketball, and bring their kids to play at the playgrounds:
Tung C Muang Park â located in the center of the city and government building area.
Nong Bua Park â located up behind Big C shopping center, way up Chayankul Road.
Fitness Centers â there are a couple of these in and around Ubon Ratchathani city, but we donât really recommend going there. In comparison to the public parks they are not good places to meet single women. Most of the women attending the fitness centers are already married and trying to stay in shape. You arenât likely to find anyone under 30 years old in there, and less likely to find anyone unmarried.
About Ubon Colleges
Ubon Ratchathani University in Warin Chamrap. Warin is the city located next to Ubon, just across the Mun River. UBU is located about 15km from downtown Ubon Ratchathani, along a major highway. This university is the best in the area, and where all those that cannot afford to send their kids to Bangkok for school, send them instead. Itâs really quite an OK school, and the level of English from the students coming out of the tourism programs is quite good in comparison to those doing the same at Rajabhat.
Students come from all over surrounding provinces to attend school at UBU. There are many thousands of female students attending bachelor and master programs here, along with hundreds of teachers too.
If UBU wasnât so far from everything, weâd recommend you just stay outside the gate and eat, drink, and live right there. Problem is â itâs too far out from town and there is little to do out there if youâre not attending school on campus.
Good times for being up around the entrance to UBU is between 11:30 am and 5 pm. There are coffee shops, snack shops, places to get a haircut, and places to have lunch and dinner there. We strongly suggest you spend some time getting to know everything in that area and handing out a lot of your cards there.
Rajabhat University in Ubon is large and has a lot of students, many or most of them are female. Women here are usually 18-22 years old. Rajabhat is about the level of a community college in the USA. Anyone gets in, and the degrees are not really worth much if you want to get a job in Bangkok or elsewhere. Iâve met many girls from Rajabhat, and I find their English is not as strong as girls coming from one of the better universities. That said, itâs a step up from technical schools, and Polytechnic.
Polytechnic â is a step up from a public technical school, but again, not a very good education. The girls usually donât speak much, if any English, and they donât pay their foreign teachers well to teach English â so I wouldnât spend much time hanging around the front of this school. The school is located in a place which makes it necessary for attendees to go far off campus for lunch anyway, with many of them heading down toward the YingCharoen Park complex to eat. In the back of this complex there used to be tents full of soup vendors â and it was 15 Thai baht per bowl. Many students ate there. Not sure it still exists, but if students is your thing â you couldnât beat that place at lunch.
Technical Schools â these are bottom of the barrel for education, and we donât recommend you hang out and try to score a girl from one of these places. Of course she would be better educated than a girl you find in the rice fieldâ¦ so, up to you.
English Programs at High Schools and Primary Schools - Many schools have English programs advertised in front of their schools on large banners or painted right on their walls. You should go in and pretend like you are interested in finding out if they need someone to teach in the program.
This does two things:
1. Introduces you to other Thais that speak English, and almost always they are Thai women.
2. Introduces you to foreigners that might already be working there. You might hit it off with someone and go have drinks and talk about good places to find good women in Ubon.
Free eBook - How to Find a Good Thai Girl in Thailand (Pt 11)
We can’t tell you what to do every day, but for the first two days – follow our suggestions. This will help you find everything you need to in the city – and get to see places you might like and want to return to repeatedly.
Have breakfast at your hotel.
1. If you arranged for Pichet to pick you up – great, if not – grab a tuk-tuk (3 wheeled motorbike with passenger seats) motorbike taxi (if you don’t have a translator) or regular taxi cab. Go to the Kodak shop to pick up your business cards.
2. Choose a coffee shop first. Thais grab coffee in the morning too – working Thais. Girls that work the bars and other naughty nightlife spots are sleeping until noon or past. This is another good bit of info. You won’t likely see a bargirl before noon.
3. If you haven’t bought the right clothes to match Thailand’s heat, you’ll know it by now. Maybe your pants or shirt are too thick or tight. Head to Robinson Center and shop for very lightweight clothes that you can wear in the stifling heat. From March to September or so, Ubon is almost unbearably hot. It’s a dry heat, sure, but you’ll be sweating steadily during this time. Light colored shirts that don’t show your sweat – are prescribed. Thais think anything but dark colored pants are impolite – so, always wear dark pants. Shorts are impolite, but tourists are overlooked for it. If you prefer shorts, I think it’s not a big problem. If you can stand it – by all means, wear pants.
From October to February it can be downright COLD in Ubon with the wind factor. It’s quite possible to breathe fog during this time, and yet it never snows. Bring long sleeves and dress for the cooler weather during these months.
4. Have lunch back up at the YingCharoen Park shopping center at the food court. If you make a habit of going to the same places you’ll start to see the girls that are interested in you – noticing you. They might be coming back at the same time and place to see you as well. You have to be smiling a lot. It makes it easier when you’re with someone, so, if you find another expat to hang out with – great. If you have a translator – make sure she eats almost all the meals with you. Talking and smiling and looking around the room – and catching eyes looking back at you, can be the start of something.
You have to remember something… the urgency of your mission. You ARE desperate. You know how in your country, you wouldn’t want to come off as desperate? In Thailand it’s OK. In fact, regular Thai girls love foreigners that are outgoing and friendly and smiling. They love not having to come over to meet you and make the first move all the time. Some still will and don’t have any trouble with it at all – but, others are a bit more reserved, probably shy that you’ll just speak English to them. If you made the effort to learn Thai – you’re going to be paid off in spades when in Isaan. Probably 5% of expats living in Thailand can speak Thai with any level of comprehension. Those that do, usually speak bargirl Thai. If you learned bargirl Thai – you are best to take some other lessons quick – and learn Bangkok Thai before you go on your bride hunt.
Reason being… you’ll attract bar girls, not good girls with talking like you just came out of a bar in Pattaya. Good girls will hear you, and go tell their bargirl friends or family members about you. Like attracts like. Lose the bargirl Thai vocabulary and start speaking like a polite and educated Thai person and many good doors will open up to you.
5. Start hitting the hospitals. Now, this will sound ridiculous to you, but we can’t think of a better place to find good Thai girls, than those working at a hospital. You might find a nurse or a doctor. Steve, one of the guys co-writing this – found his lovely wife in a Bangkok hospital. And she’s beautiful too! You’re almost definitely going to find someone that had a bachelors degree or better. Most of the hospital personnel are well educated (for Thais) and have had extra English classes as well. I met an emergency room doctor in Sisaket that was just lovely – and would make a great wife for some lucky guy, and yet there she was in Sisaket and not going to find any foreigner any time soon.
Create some malady that prompts you to go to the hospitals. Don’t’ go to the clinics, those small open-air rooms you see from the street with 26 sick Thais waiting to get in. Go to hospitals – public and private. Either make something up that you need to be checked out for, or go for a medical condition you have. Have your blood pressure checked. Have them check your blood for something. Have them do a complete blood workup. Do something that requires you to be in there for 30 minutes to an hour or two.
Smile at all the lovely nurses and talk to as many people as possible. Hand out your card like it was free candy. Again, the urgency has to take hold of you or you might find yourself sitting in a bar and drinking bottle after brown bottle of Singha beer – in a mug full of ice. Seriously, that’s how they drink beer in Thailand, and especially Isaan – it’s quite hot when it’s that time of year.
Some Ubon Hospitals:
Sapphasit Hospital – the main public hospital in town, located just up from Tung C Muang a couple of streets, and near the Laithong Hotel. There is a nurses college in the same area – best of both worlds, right? At lunch time you would also be smart to go eat at the places you see all the nurses eating at. In fact, there are enough places to eat and coffee shops and bakeries to stay over here for the better part of your day if you wanted. Forget about girls working in retail – and go straight for the gold… nurses, doctors, and other specialists. If it were me – I’d be here, or finding out where the teachers all eat and go to spend time.
Rajavej Private Hospital – located on Chayankul Road, same side as Big C, but not as far from Tung C Muang Park. This is a clean, hospital and I’ve always found the nurses to be friendly.
Ubonrak Thonburi Hospital – Located down near Tung C. Muang park, behind Anuban Ubon School a couple of streets. Ok, about 5 streets. See the map for the exact location.
6. Choose a place for dinner. One thing you might do – I would – is head over to Tung C. Muang park between the park and Anuban Ubon School are a lot of food vendors. If you wait until night time they are also selling pad Thai, gwit diao noodles, som tam, and other meals. There’s always someone doing grilled chicken too (gai yang / gai bing).
7. Go have some coffee somewhere – one of the coffee spots you liked best and figure out which club you’ll go to. If you’ve already hit The Rock, then go to e-Bar or U-Bar and see if you like them.
Free eBook - How to Find a Good Thai Girl in Thailand (Pt 10)
The next morning when you wake up – go have some breakfast in the main restaurant of the Ubon International Hotel. If you found Pichet and can use him to take you around day after day, then great. It’s not essential, and some of you won’t be able to catch him – that’s OK. You can find taxis in front of the hotel. Start your adventure by visiting these places in the order they are listed below:
1. Kodak Photo Shop down by Tung C. Muang park in the center of the city. You’ll make 300-500 business cards here that you can hand out to women you meet so they have the phone number for you – and/or your translator. Make them nice style cards – on the expensive side compared to what they have as samples. You want to impress the women.
Information to include on your card:
- Nickname (full name too). Thais take nicknames in English like “New Year”, “Pepsi”, “Benz”, and other funny names – Rabbit, Boom, etc. While you shouldn’t choose a funny name like one of those, something like “Mick” or “Tim” is fine. Translate everything into Thai too – don’t just use English.
- If you’re a good looking guy – put your photo on the card. So, bring one on a CD-ROM, or, they can take a photo of you there at the shop. They also do passport photos.
- List your business. What you do. If you’re a train engineer, say that. If you’re retired – say retired, surgeon… or whatever you were during your working days.
- Country of origin.
- Translator’s phone – if you’re using one.
- Your Phone in Thailand and in your home country – with the correct country code.
- Any websites you have.
Ask them to finish the cards by the next morning – and you’ll pick them up. Rush service if necessary – just get them as soon as possible, your target is just 30 days and every minute counts. That’s what you should feel like – you’re on a mission, the mission of your life – and you must not fail. There is no time to waste, to be lazy. Walk all over Ubon and find your wife. She’s there believe me – there are so many eligible girls in that city, many of them pure gems.
2. Tesco Lotus and the Dunkin Donut coffee shop. Try the coffee – I’ve had it a couple of dozen times and it’s nothing to get excited about, but you can force a cup down and watch all the foot traffic go past you – many of the girls staring at you because you’re one of only about 10 farangs (foreigners) they’ll see that week.
3. KFC in Robinson center. Stroll by the glass walls and peer through. Anybody of interest? If so, have some fries now or when you come out of Robison’s.
4. Robinson center – and the coffee shop on ground floor. Usually good coffee here depending which employee is making it.
5. Swenson’s Ice Cream in Robinsons – get an ice cream and sit down in a place that will enable you to see all the customers coming in. Single girls often come in – with or without other single girl friends.
6. YingCharoen Park, across from Rajabhat University – and the coffee shops inside it. Make sure you hit every floor – all 3. Eat lunch here at the large food court. There are always available women here. Hint – all Thais seem to get out for lunch at noon. Get to the food court before that, get your food, and sit down to watch the rush. Always sit facing where you expect all the other people to be. You’ll catch people looking at you all the time – smile! Thais love smiles, it makes them feel comfortable enough to talk to you first. If you’re always smiling – you’ll notice that you meet a lot of people in Thailand. Be approachable.
7. Tung C Muang Park – after 4:30 pm. Sit around until people start coming, and then start walking around and smiling at people. They’ll know you are new in town and some people will talk to you.
Go have a shower back at your hotel and then head back out to check out some of the clubs. As a rule the clubs don’t really get going until 9 pm, but, you don’t necessarily care – you want to meet women, and sometimes that is easier when the clubs are not full. Other times, it’s easier when they’re packed.
Hit all the clubs to see what they are like. You want to find clubs with a lot of people, but, more importantly – a place where it might be easy to meet women. I find that crowded clubs are pretty good – because inevitably you bump into a girl, or she bumps into you. It’s also very easy to meet waitresses at restaurants you go to – and many of them, seeing a dead end life, are possibly open to dating foreigners.
You may notice that you have more girls approach you to talk when you’re not with your translator – if you have one. Have her stay in the background then, and only come over when it looks like you’re having trouble communicating with a girl you’re talking with.
Don’t be shy to call girls over to talk – with or without the translator. If your Thai is OK enough to speak on a general level – that is all you need. If I want to meet someone I call them over and tell them my name, and ask their name. I ask where they come from. I ask where they were born. I ask if they speak English at all. I ask what schools they went to. If I like the girl I’ll ask what time she gets off work – what time is she free? You can ask if a girl wants to go to dinner with you. You can tell her to choose where you both eat.
One thing about Thai girls is that, when asked to dinner by a foreigner, they will often bring at least one other girl friend with them. This is for a couple of reasons:
1. It’s Thai style to bring someone else so it doesn’t appear that the girl is dating you – if she is not. Rumors fly fast and furious in Ubon and all Thai towns except maybe Bangkok, being too big for it.
2. The girl you asked to dinner might not feel like she has enough to talk about and brings her friend for some comfort. She may also be afraid, and this takes care of any weird feelings about it.
If you have a female translator with you – bring her - and then make it clear to the girl you want to ask to dinner that it is just her to come to dinner, not her and her friends or family.
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Next Step – Now What?
You have your translator lined up and you are ready to take the plane to Ubon.
Call Pichet from your hotel in Bangkok to his house in Ubon. His phone number is: 083.129.3998. Ask him to pick you up from the airport, and tell him exactly when your plane arrives. Don’t be put off if you can’t get every word across to the guy. On the phone Thai and English are very difficult to understand. He’s an older guy, so speak loudly enough. If you can’t communicate what you want, have your translator give him a call and speak Thai to him, telling him to pick you up at the Ubon airport at whatever time you arrive.
Pichet is a Thai man, he’s about 65 years old. He is a remarkable business man… started out with very little. Well - nothing. He worked at the mental health facility in town for some years as he went about buying property for dirt cheap, and building dorm rooms for university girls. It used to be JUST girls – and this is where I stayed for many months. Now he also accepts guys and it’s not as sweet a place as it once was, but, it’s Pichet that makes things happen in Ubon for you. Literally anything you want to happen – he is the ultimate connection to have in Ubon.
On top of that, he’s a very nice guy and very trustable. He has run a taxi service from the train station in Warin Chamrap for years and years. This is how I met him. He was the only one in a group of 50 taxi guys that spoke English well enough to ask me “Where you go? Can I help you?”
Arriving at Ubon Ratchathani airport you’ll meet up with Pichet. To see a photo of Pichet, send a blank email to: FindThaiWife@gmail.com. The auto-reply message will have a link to Pichet’s photo and a lot of other information. Don’t neglect this step or you’ll miss out. The Google map alone is worth the effort.
One thing worth noting. If you are coming to Thailand to meet a girl and you don’t necessarily care if she was a bargirl or worked in the industry before – you just want a nice girl that no longer works in the industry – Pichet can likely help you find a girl like this in Ubon.
Forget the translator in this case, and just fly from Bangkok to Ubon, call Pichet and tell him you need a place to stay. He’ll set you up in a small, comfortable room in the middle of 60 other university kids that room in the dorms surrounding you. He has cable TV, WIFI internet, warm showers, and is an incredible resource for finding what you require. He will do his best to find a girl you like.
He is incredibly resourceful, but, only when money is coming into his pocket – or, when he likes you as a good friend. You won’t be a good friend for nearly a year, so you’ll have to keep handing over 500 THB notes to keep him happy. If you’re not, he won’t be happy and you probably won’t even have the slightest idea. Your girl-searching adventure will slowly coast to a stop, and Pichet won’t be as helpful as he could be. Keep the 500 THB notes flowing – a couple per day for general help, and 1,000 THB for anything that gives you the happy ending and he should be pretty happy and doing his best for you.
Five-hundred Thai Baht is $15 USD. If you can’t see spending $30 USD per day for someone to help you do all you need to in Ubon – don’t go.
If you are really looking for a GOOD Thai girl – I wouldn’t use Pichet for anything more than transportation and inside knowledge about Ubon. He does know his way around the naughty nightlife, and he is incredibly resourceful in finding teen (18-19) university students that are looking for a little bit of extra money. But, for finding “good girls” – no.
Just trust me on that.
Ok then, back to the plan… once you arrive at the Ubon airport and meet up with Pichet – ask him to take you to your hotel, Nevada Hotel. Thais pronounce Nevada like “Nehhh VA DUH” the emphasis is on the last and middle syllables. Strongest emphasis on the last syllable. Thais still call it Nevada, but the name has changed to “Ubon International Hotel”.
If you cannot reach Pichet on the phone – there is a chance he is traveling or away from town for whatever reason. Keep trying him during your stay and probably you’ll reach him at some point.
Pichet is not crucial to your finding a good Thai wife – there are many taxi drivers in Ubon, tuk-tuk, songthaew drivers, and motorbike taxi drivers. Pichet is good to know if you can find him.
Why Nevada Hotel?
Ubon International Hotel (formerly Nevada Inn Hotel)
434 Chayankul Road, Nai Mueang, Mueang Ubon Ratchathani, Ubon Ratchathani 34000
Phone: +66 45 313 358, use the +66 from outside Thailand. If inside Thailand just dial 045.313.358.
There are nicer hotels – nicer rooms, better service and more lovely grounds. Forget all that. Nevada is located in the shopping district of Ubon I guess you might say, right on upper Chayankul (pronounced Chayankun) Road. It has many floors, 151 rooms, and has a large swimming pool, bars and restaurants. There are massage places within the complex, and within walking distance are a couple more. These are traditional Thai massage establishments and no happy ending is offered. Usually.
Nevada Hotel also has “The Rock” – the biggest nightclub in Ubon, and the biggest around for many miles. The Rock has shows nightly (dancing ladyboys and sexy girl dance routines) and it’s quite something to stop in there after 9 pm some nights. It might become a fairly regular haunt for you if you can stand the ear-splitting music.
Nevada is convenient to a couple of shopping areas. You can walk a short distance, or grab a taxi to the shopping mall across from the biggest university in Ubon – Rajabhat University. You’ll notice uni girls running around there in their tight white shirts and black skirts.
Before Pichet leaves, plan to meet up with him for lunch, dinner, or whichever meal comes next. Tell him you’re paying – and ask him to pick you up and take you to a nice restaurant like the floating bamboo huts on the river by “Ring Road”. Pichet doesn’t drink alcohol so your bill will be about $12 for a great meal. If you drink, beer is a couple dollars for a large, 22-ounce beer with 5-6% alcohol content.
If you have a translator with you from Bangkok, just tell her you’ll get started in the morning – if you haven’t already, give her 100 THB for dinner she can have at the hotel.
At the appointed time – let’s say it’s dinner, you meet Pichet out front and ask him to take you to Big C so you can get a cheap mobile phone and SIM card to use for a phone number while you’re in Thailand. There are a number of phone businesses there and hundreds of styles to choose from. Get a decent phone that you’ll be able to hear with. Cheap phones have horrible sound and it won’t be worth it to get the cheapest phones in the long-run. Buy something about 6,000 THB ($200 USD) for the best experience.
Go eat excellent Thai food and ask Pichet anything you want to about Thai culture, and how he might help you accomplish your goal.
When you get back to your hotel – check out The Rock and see if it’s not something you’ll be spending some time at. Ask your translator to come down with you if you don’t feel like going alone. It’s a giant club with a few hundred people in it each night. On weekends, there must be 500+ and maybe 1000+. It is easy to meet people there and if you see a table of girls you can invite them to your table for a glassy of whiskey. Most Thai women in regular clubs won’t drink beer, but will drink 100 Pipers whiskey. It’s palatable; really it’s not too bad. If you are drinking Johnny Walker Red – that is a big step up. If you have Black – you are somebody. Blue or Green? Nobody is ever drinking it – but, it’s safe to say you wouldn’t be drinking it in The Rock either.
The crowd at The Rock is a mix of all sorts of Thais. Literally, everyone is there except workers from the rice fields. Doctors, lawyers and other high-so types, blue-collar, tech school boys, university students, Thai teachers, foreign teachers, and foreign Muay Thai boxers – Ubon is a top training spot for the sport and attracts a fair number of boxers, some of them world-class.
By 11:30 pm everyone is feeling good and it’s quite a good time. The ladyboy show is pretty good – and sometimes there are ladyboys dancing with the girls during the dance numbers. See if you can pick them out
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Why Ubon Ratchathani?
Ubon is also known as Ubol. Ubol Ratchathani was a well known rest and relaxation base for soldiers from the USA and other countries who were fighting in the Vietnam war. The Thais in Ubon remember the soldiers, and for some reason the foreigners left a good impression on the Thais. Could have been that the money they brought to the area was welcome, and it was the start of Ubon as a major city of Isaan, which it definitely is now. Walking through the town I often had older men especially â want to touch my arm or handâ¦ they didnât know how to speak English enough to ask if I would shake their hand or talk to them, but they wanted some of my âluckâ to rub offâ¦ they wanted to remember the old days when Ubol was teeming with soldiers. They missed the âgood old daysââ¦
I spent a couple of years in Isaan, and in Ubon in particular for much of that time. Ubon is a special place â and the one place Iâll recommend you go to look for a Thai wife. There are many reasons for it â but it ultimately comes down to the fact that the Thai people in Ubon are friendly and generally love foreigners. Really, itâs one of the best places I found to meet Thais, and especially Thai girls.
Ubon has a lot of girls that are of marriage age â and marriage-minded.
There are numerous universities in Ubon that have large populations of Thai girls. Rajabhat, Polytechnic, Ubon Ratchathani University, and then about 4 major technical schools â most of which have guys attending, but there are also decent numbers of women. If you are 30-35 years old, you can target university girls if thatâs what you desire for your new wife. I was 38 when I found my 22 year old recent college graduate girlfriend, that has turned into my wife of 7 years. I donât know that Iâd recommend a bigger age-gap than we have. Sure, you might be happy enough with it â but the girl might feel like sheâs missing out on life if youâve got grey hair, are 50+ years old and sheâs 22.
Another reason to go to Ubon is that there are many retail stores there. Girls with university degrees are working in many of the Ubon retail shops, at the malls and shopping areas.
Ubon has a couple of big parks where fit-minded Thais go to exercise in the early evening after 5 pm. Tung C. Muang Park, and Nong Bua Park.
Yet another reason to go to Ubon is that itâs cheap enough to stay for a month â and pay your translatorâs room and food there.
And yet another reason to go to Ubon to find a wife is that there are no western pay for sex establishments. Donât get me wrong, there are plenty of them â but, they cater to Thais and not western visitors. There are more than 50 such businesses in Ubon.
The big drawback to Ubon is that very few people speak English to any degree at all â thatâs why it is essential that you either speak Thai or bring a translator with you. It is very difficult to find someone to speak English with, though that is changing a little bit. Ex-bargirls and other sex workers that have returned to Ubon to live, can speak English. So, be wary of girls that speak English well in Ubon. They might have gone to university and majored in tourism and had many extra classes to help them learn English, or, they may have just got off the bus from Pattaya, retiring from a life on their back with their feet up in the air!
The girls in Ubon are the cream of the crop. Actually, there are many other cities where this is also true, Khon Kaen, Buriram, Roi Ett, Mukdahan, Sisaket, Nong Khai, Amnat Charoen, Surin, Yasothan. But, these cities are not ideal for finding a Thai wife for one reason or other. Usually itâs that you wonât find girls in sufficient quantity to look for a wife there.
The other reason Ubon is the place to go?
Pichet lives there.
Free eBook - How to Find a Good Thai Wife in Thailand (Pt 7)
You’ve either learned Thai or found someone to translate for you as you go off on your Thai wife hunt. You know the major barriers to finding a Thai wife and you’re ready to go.
You should have about $10,000 USD saved, just in case there is any emergency, and that’s not including your plane ticket to arrive in Bangkok.
Make your plane reservation to Bangkok (BKK - airport code). Make it a one-way, or open-ended return ticket because you don’t know how long you’ll be staying. At least 30 days, and possibly longer. Make a reservation for a hotel in Bangkok that will pick you up at the airport because there could be a significant fee for a cab ride to your hotel if you don’t. If you don’t care – no matter. I try to avoid Bangkok taxis at all costs, but of course it’s impossible if you’re there for any length of time.
There’s little point in staying in Bangkok unless you’re going to meet your translator there. If that’s the case – take a taxi to the address of the translation company, meet her. Qualify her – do you understand her English? Ask her questions about her background, what university she went to, etc.
Make sure she understands that you’ll be in Ubon for a couple of weeks. Make sure she understands that you may cut her short – before that time, and you’ll give her 3,000 THB severance for cutting it short if that happens. That’s $100 USD and will enable her to either get a flight back to Bangkok, or take the train ($22 one-way a/c).
Ideally you would meet someone in Ubon to translate for you – because you’ll save the plane fair, severance, and even hotel room because the girl can stay at her home in Ubon while you stay at the hotel in the one room you need to pay for.
There are also translators in Ubon you can speak with. I’d recommend someone in Ubon, but you might have trouble booking her – as she is always busy with school and getting various businesses up and running.
Her name is Benz. Her email bounced on me recently, but I’m sure she has another one. She lives in Ubon and she speaks English well enough to help you with what you need. Benz is quite street smart and knows her way around the city. She is also well-connected and you would not want to cheat her out of any money due her.
The way to find her is how I did… I got off the plane in Ubon, walked into the public non-restricted area where the taxi guys are waiting to pick you up – I made a right and walked until I saw the convenience store – it’s more like a tourist souvenir shop. That was where I met her. She no longer works there, but I am sure the women working there know her and have her phone number in their phone. If you can get the point across – you just might be able to connect with her.
Feel free to contact any other translator you can find in Ubon to help. This is just a starting point. Benz may or may not be available, and I have no way of controlling that. If she can’t do it for you, she may know someone that can.
If you can’t find someone in Ubon Ratchathani to help you with translations you’ll have to bring someone from Bangkok. Or, another option would be finding someone in a neighboring town – Nakhon Ratchasima (Korat), Khon Kaen, or elsewhere. Use Google a lot to look for girls that do translations in Ubon and neighboring cities. Korat might be a good city to search, it’s very large and there are many foreigners living there.
You want a translator that is not, was not, ever a bar girl. Why? She’ll do the smartest thing she could – connect you with one of her bargirl friends or relatives. If, when you meet the girl that is to be your translator she has tattoos or other clues tell you that she is, or was a bargirl – tell her you are sorry, and go find someone else. This is crucial. Don’t settle for a bargirl because otherwise you’re going to get funneled toward other bargirls. You should have just taken a bus straight to Pattaya from Bangkok instead.
Before you agree to hire a translator make sure she knows what her job will be. She will need to introduce you to women in Ubon, or, wherever you are. You might visit other cities too. You will have business cards made up with your name on them – and this translator’s name too. She’ll be handing them out for you, helping you meet as many women as possible.
Here are some translators I found with Google searches that you can try:
English Center Ubon, Phone: 086.246.0754
100 Ratchabut Road, Mueang Ubon Ratchathani, Ubon Ratchathani, 34000
Thai English Translation in Bangkok, Phone: 02-255-0622 or, +66-2-255-0622
Ploymitr Building, Floor 7, 81 Soi Sukhumvit 2, Sukhumvit Road, Khlong Toei Sub-district, Khlong Toei District, Bangkok 10110, Thailand
Here is a girl in Ubon that teaches English to Thais – but, her English is good enough to translate for you though she probably doesn’t have time to do it full-time:
Kruel Ooh, 100 Ratchabut Road 086.246.0754 – use that number if you’re in Thailand, or +66 86.246.0754 if outside Thailand.
Another option for finding Thai-English translators?
Freelancer. What you might try is to join all the major Thai dating services and start emailing girls in Ubon to find a translator there. More about dating services later.
Anyway, if you don’t have your flight arranged to reach Ubon - immediately upon arrival, go to the bright red Air Asia counter and get a reservation for a flight from Bangkok to Ubon Ratchathani (UBP – airport code).
For a girl traveling with you from Bangkok to Ubon you can probably expect to pay 1,000 THB per day for her help in translating everything you need to. Her travel and food you will be paying as well. For breakfast you might pay 300 THB for both of you. Lunch – 80 THB, Dinner – 200 THB. So, count on $30 per day for food for both of you. Once you meet up with a girl you like you’ll be adding another few hundred baht per day to food costs. Even eating very well you’ll not spend more than 1,500 THB for three of you per day. So, budget for that amount.
Your room in Ubon will run about 1100 THB per day for a superior room. Your translator’s room – the same. These are the least expensive rooms at Ubon International Hotel (Nevada) today (2011). There are cheaper rooms in Ubon – and, if you manage to hook up with “Pichet”, he can give you a room for something like 5,000 THB ($166 USD per month), if you want to do it that way.
So, per day for food and room, count on the most - 3,700 THB – about $111 USD, once you arrive in Ubon. Plus 1,000 THB ($30) for her fee per day – whatever you work that out to be. You should be able to bring it down from 1,000 THB per day since you’ll need her for a few weeks.
Free eBook - How to Find a Good Thai Wife in Thailand (Pt 6)
Barrier â Some Thai women wonât consider marrying a foreigner.
Youâve heard the stories â Thai women are crazy for foreigners. Well, some are and some are not. Some are not at all. There are many Thai women that would never consider marriage to a foreigner and there are a variety of reasons for it.
Here are some:
1. The woman comes from a high-society type family that considers only other high-society type Thais or Chinese for marriage into the family.
2. Some Thai girls are afraid of foreigners. As you know, Thailand doesnât pull the cream of the crop â the CrÃ¨me de la crÃ¨me of society, as visitors. In the past especially, there have been basically 3 types of visitor to Thailand.
B. Backpackers with no money, looking to see as much as possible for as free as possible.
C. Guys that bring their family.
Of these, group C is the smallest by far. Group A â the biggest. Over the years Thais are becoming more cautious and afraid of foreigners because they are hearing more about the crazy exploits some of us are up to. Pattaya is just a cesspool of behavior, that most good Thai girls donât want to be a part of. With the internet, stories about foreigners are passed around easily and there are enough negative stories to turn a lot of women off the idea of marrying a foreigner.
Even if you find a Thai girl willing to date and marry you, she might be totally unwilling to return to your home country with you â whether that is in Canada, UK, USA, Australia, or Singapore. There are so many stories out there now about girls from Thailand that have been tricked into being sex slaves and drug mules for guys that promised them a better life in another country. In the past they were just stories, but now that the internet is so widespread it is easy to get factual stories about all the scary things going on in the world to Thai girls that leave the safety of their home â for a foreign land.
When you come to Thailand looking for your bride, youâll likely find girls that just have no interest in moving to your country â be prepared for it, and move on if itâs a requirement you have. One thing that might help convince a Thai girl to move over with you is if you are in an area of your country where there are many other Thai and Asian people. No Thai girl wants to be the only one in the city youâre in. If you live in London, San Francisco, New York, or any of 50 other major cities with a Chinatown area â youâll have a better chance at bringing a Thai girl with you than you would if you lived in a log cabin in the forest in Oregon.
Barrier: Some Thai Girls Are Already Married to Thai Guys
Thai guys have a remarkable tolerance for letting their wives marry a foreigner, when it means that he will be supported and not have to work. This happens over and over, and a fellow author friend of mine had this happen three weeks ago. He was married to a woman that lived in Sisaket province, in the northeast. He was there for 4-6 months per year with her â but, he always needed to return to Los Angeles, California to make more money so he could return again. Their plan was that eventually he would move to Thailand full-time, but he was having difficulty making that happen.
I wrote him to find out when the next visit here would be and he told me that heâs coming in November, but that he was burned by his wife â who already had a Thai husband. I didnât ask how it happened, better not to make him relive it, I thought.
This happens quite often. Guess what? It usually happens with girls that were in the pay-for-play industry before. A girl that sold herself for 500 THB ($15 USD) at a time, canât be trusted to be faithful to you â no matter how much better you make her life. Girls in The Industry are always looking for more cash and a better deal. No, they donât want to give up the deal they haveâ¦ they just want it to get better. They do whatever they need to for that to happen. Often times it means taking multiple husbands.
There are girls on Beach Road in Pattaya that already have fiancÃ©s sending them money monthly, but they are still turning tricks because they can still make a couple thousand Thai baht per night doing so. If her fiancÃ© is sending her 20,000 or even 40,000 THB per month â itâs nice, but she wants more. Never mind that she and her entire family of 8 brothers and sisters, mom, dad, and grandparents can all live on 40,000 THB â she wants more because she is still in survival mode and knows that she wonât be young and good looking forever. She makes money while she can. Itâs this survival mode that one of the reasons you donât want to marry a Thai girl that worked on her back. They all seem to have this idea that whatever they can do to make more money, now while they are young and they can â is OK.
Looking at it from her perspectiveâ¦ how far can she trust a guy coming from abroad that comes to Pattaya to pay for sex with many different Thai girls, has probably been coming for years and is on the game himself? Should she risk that this guy is a great guy that will solve her money problems, give her a family, and stop whoring?
I donât think sheâd be smart to trust a guy like that. But, I donât think itâs right that she takes his cash and says sheâll be faithful to him and stop working the bars or streets â and then keeps right on working.
Free eBook - How to Find a Good Thai Wife in Thailand (Pt 5)
Instead of launching straight into “The Plan” I want to talk about the other barriers to finding a great Thai woman to marry, first.
As I said at the beginning of the book, if you are looking for a prostitute to marry you will have no problem whatsoever in completing that goal within hours or days – if you so choose. There are guys that come for a couple days, find a woman working in a bar in one of the sexpat areas – and either marry her here in Thailand or arrange for a fiancé visa within days. That is a high risk proposition, and really not very smart. I won’t go into all the bizarre stories that have happened as a result of this foolhardy practice, you can find them on StickmanBangkok.com by the hundreds. Check out the “Reader’s Submissions” page. There are so many stories you couldn’t read them all in a week.
Avoiding prostitutes is something that will take some doing. There are some general guidelines you can follow, but you must realize that none of this is foolproof. There are girls that absolutely do not fit the mold of prostitute, or ex-prostitute, and yet – they were – for years maybe. Some of the smartest guys are fooled over this. We’ll give you some things to look out for that might signal the girl you are considering for marriage worked in a pay-for-play area of Thailand.
To Avoid Prostitutes and ex-Prostitutes, Avoid Thai Girls:
1. That smoke – a girl that smokes, is a girl with one of four backgrounds
A. An agricultural worker that spent most (all) her life working in the fields. She is unlikely to have a high school education. Some farm workers pick up the habit in the fields.
B. A Thai woman that smokes might have come from overseas where she either grew up, or lived for some amount of time with another man that was maybe her husband or long-term boyfriend.
C. A dyke, a Tom. Tom’s are girls that play the role of men and try to get Thai women to sleep with them and form relationships with them. Occasionally you’ll see one smoking, as she’s trying to show people she is manly. You won’t likely be very interested in one of these ‘girls’ because they dress like men, have short hair, and rarely look or interact with foreigners at all.
D. An ex- or current prostitute.
Really, there aren’t any other real options. Maybe one out of 500 other girls, regular Thai girls, will smoke. It is very rare because in Thailand smoking is a man thing. In southern Thailand men smoke – nearly all of them. In the northeast, it’s less – but still there are quite a few now. Good Thai women? Very, VERY rarely. So, take that for what it’s worth. It’s a sign, that’s all – not 100%. But it’s 98% one of the options above.
Oh wait, you know what? Forgot one. There is one more type of girl that tends to smoke more than any of the other girls, and that’s a ladyboy. There are many ladyboys that smoke. Just another reason to avoid smoking Thai ‘girls’!
If you are one of those guys that really loves it when a girl smokes, find a girl that doesn’t smoke and teach her to smoke.
2. With Tattoos – this one is rather tricky. I knew a girl in Mathyom 4 (Thai 10th Grade) – at sixteen years old. She already had 3 tattoos and was going to a private Christian school where some friends of mine taught. She was a sort of ‘bad girl’ and was even smoking at the time. Was she a prostitute? No, I don’t think so. I’m pretty sure she was not. However, she was often seen hanging around a gang of boys that were involved in drug selling and other nastiness. There is a chance she straightened up and went on to lead a good life without having stepped foot inside the bars. I’m going to guess she is, today, working in a bar or other adult establishment and taking money for sex. Just a guess.
Thai girls that take cash for sex are, by FAR, the Thai girls you’ll see with tattoos most often. Though regular girls are sometimes getting tattoos now, you can be sure that traditional girls from Isaan or upcountry, are not even considering it. No good girl wants to be associated with the lowest level of society – the prostitutes and drug users, the thieves, and so forth. Few traditional girls from Isaan with a family of teachers or other professionals, will get a tattoo.
There are Thais in Bangkok mostly, that think tattoos are fashionable. Look at Angelina Jolie – she’s basically a walking billboard. Sometimes Thai girls who think they are fashionable will also get tattoos. This is probably changing dramatically at the moment, and in ten years half the girls in the country over 21 years old will have them.
At the moment it is still a somewhat reliable indicator that the girl is or has been in the pay-for-sex career field at some point.
Another thing that matters is where the tattoo is on the girl’s body. One of the girls that works at our local post office has two tattoos of flowers on the top of her chest. That, and the way she looks at me – and the fairly good level of English she can speak, lets me know that she was a prostitute in the past – I’m 95% sure… or more. I don’t know whether she did it for two weeks, or for two years, or ten. But I do know that you are VERY unlikely to meet a Thai girl with tattoos on the upper part of her breasts – that was not a bargirl or working in the industry somewhere.
So, tattoos are a sign, not a great sign – but not bad either. Take them into account when you meet a new girl and try to figure out where she might have had them done. There is a chance she was never a bad girl, and she spent some time overseas with a boyfriend or husband that encouraged her to get tattoos too.
I’ll just throw this out there – I’m not sure how spot –on it is, but I think this is a good sign – maybe as high as 90% likely you’ve found a prostitute if…
The girl has a strange shiny thing on one of her teeth. I have no idea what this is, and I haven’t seen one for the past 5 years. It’s been that long since I’ve been hanging out in Patong Beach or Pattaya though. When I saw it on a German expat’s wife today – who was smoking, and from Patong Beach, but born in northeast Thailand… I remembered, those things on the girls’ teeth are VERY popular in Pattaya and Patong Beach.
Is it a great marker for those in “The Industry”? I think a very good one, but open to other opinions on this because it isn’t something I’ve thought about much at all. I’m sure I haven’t seen one in 5 years – anywhere in the non-sexpat areas of Thailand.
3. That know Pattaya, Patpong, Patong Beach, or some other bar area or sexpat area. Most of the good Thai women I know have never seen the inside of a bar, and have never been to the 3 places I mentioned. Good Thai women just don’t go there, there is no reason to. There is no desire to. Thai guys do not bring their women to the bars – if you haven’t noticed. They go with their friends. Why? They’re going to look at and chat up women – sometimes. Why bring their wives or girlfriends?
If the girl you’re with is showing you around Pattaya, then she better have a real good reason why she knows the area so well. Born there? I’d already suspect her. Worked in a pizza place there – or working as anything there? I’d already suspect her.
Pattaya, the entire area, is caught up in a different reality than the rest of Thailand. People that are in Pattaya are playing the game – sex for money. I have met numerous girls that were working the hotels there, serving me pizza, or waiting on me at the McDonald’s – that were ready to go back to my room with me. It’s a place where even once good women –see freelancing and making some extra cash in this high cost of living area – as OK, and they end up doing it too.
I have a couple friends that swear up and down that there isn’t an honest woman, a non-prostitute, within the cities of Pattaya or Patong Beach. I have seen them bed women that were married, and that looked like they were off the game – but turns out they were taking money for sex. The entire place is suspect, and you can’t possibly go looking for a girl to marry that knows one of the sexpat areas inside and out. Save yourself the time and effort and go book a hotel on Walking Street or Beach Road in Pattaya and you’ll find exactly the type of no-class girl you are looking for.
4. Have sisters, moms, or close friends that are prostitutes. Let’s say you met what you thought was a great girl here in Thailand and you were she was the one for you. You spent weeks or months together and all was “right”. You made a plan to go meet her family and you find out that one or more of her sisters works in Pattaya and they came back to meet you at the house with the family. What would you do?
Get out as fast as you got in.
Really. There are SO many available girls in the country that you need not mess with anyone with close ties to the sex-for-money areas. Sisters tell sisters a hell of a lot in Thailand. They influence each other a lot. What usually happens, from what we’ve seen is that the good girl begins to think of her sister that is taking money for sex as a good girl just doing what she doesn’t have a choice about. She’ll rationalize that it’s OK to do.
I think one major issue with having sisters or close friends that work in the industry is that a good woman starts to focus on money – obsessively. There can be a lot of money made as a prostitute in Pattaya. I saw a dark-skinned, skinny girl on Beach Road as I laid out on the beach and read a book – that went with seven guys in two hours. If the going rate was 500 THB – and it was, she made 3,500 baht plus any tip – for two hours of work. She was still going when I left the beach too. I don’t think it’s a stretch to guess that she could have made 5,000 THB every day she decided to step out the door in her tight satin shorts and half-shirt. She could literally be pulling in more than most of us expats – at $5,000 USD per month. Sure she’s risking her life, but wow, there’s money in the business for some of the girls that choose to do it.
Girls in the industry look at foreigners as big wallets, ATM machines. They are always looking for hand-outs and always want more money. The topic of their conversations is often – money. They want a newer car, a newer phone, a better computer, some more gold, gold for her family, gold for her cow. The cycle is never-ending, and it’s not what you want to marry into.
I’m not saying that every girl with a sister that takes money for sexual favors in Pattaya is not good wife material. But, she’d never be my wife material. I’d start with someone clean and fresh, untainted. I’d start with a girl that knew nobody working in the industry and a girl that had never been in a bar in her life. I’d start with a girl like my wife. No, I’m NOT suggesting you look up my wife, I’m just saying – start with someone that has everything going for her. Why not stack the deck in your favor?
Those are a couple basic guidelines to avoiding prostitutes and finding decent Thai girls. Of course the big one is – avoid finding any girl in a bar, massage place, soapy, disco, or other adult establishment.
Yes, discos too! Not all discos – but those in or around sexpat areas like Pattaya, Patpong, Patong Beach, and now Udonthani is becoming a haven for girls from Pattaya that prefer the smaller town atmosphere.
On the one hand, there are plenty of girls that are not prostitutes in Thailand’s discos and nightclubs. On the other hand – there are plenty of freelancers at these clubs, and it is impossible to tell whether a girl just got out of the bar or soapy and is looking for some paid action – or, whether she is just a college girl out for a night of fun with her friends. In the areas mentioned, you’ll find plenty of both types of girls.
Free eBook - How to Find a Good Thai Wife in Thailand (Pt 4)
Whichever option you choose – learning Thai yourself, or paying someone to translate for you – there are a number of questions you’re going to need to ask someone before you both decide you are right for each other. Thai – Foreigner relationships are different in their make-up than relationships born in your own country.
Make sure you talk about the following topics with your wife to be – as a minimum:
1. Where will you live after marriage?
If it’s your country – make sure she has a good idea what life is like there. Buy a cheap $200 camera and make videos of you walking around your house and neighborhood to show her what it will be like. Show your pictures of 6 feet of snow if that’s what you get in the Winters. Show her your sister’s kids that live with you. Show her the parks, schools, and attractions that are close by your home in your country so she has a great idea what she’s getting into.
If you are planning on staying in Thailand – make sure you agree on a city to stay. Do you really want to stay with her family in the village? Many (most) guys cannot handle such a thing. It sounds romantic (or something) when you first consider the idea, but the reality is that village life is VERY slow, and very boring. If you need an internet connection – make sure you can get it before you move. If you need satellite TV – make sure it’s available. If you need to get pizza once a month, make sure it is within driving distance.
I have a friend that is living at the very edge of the northeast part of Thailand. Literally, if you go northeast from Bangkok as far as you can – and before you cross the Mun River to Laos – you will arrive at my friend’s village. He has been there a little less than two years. He thought he could handle it. He teaches in their school and gets great money for the cost of living. His wife also teaches there. His daughter goes to school there. Well, he has finally reached the end – he can’t take it any longer. He’s going back to Hawaii to teach for a year and save up some cash to pay off his new Honda and payoff some bills he had before he moved to Thailand.
I know some guys that have lived in the villages of Isaan for a decade, and more. Some are quite happy. Who’s the guy that wrote “Thai Girl”? I think he’s been in the village for a decade or longer. Apparently he is loving it. At least if you believe the book.
2. When you move to your new residence – is it permanent, and you plan on living there for the next 30 years?
Or, are you flexible about moving in a few years if you are both not satisfied where you are? Being flexible is important in a dual-culture marriage.
3. Will she drive in your country or Thailand?
Does she drive in Thailand? Will you pay for her lessons so she can learn? Will you buy a car in Thailand if you stay here, or, will you both be on motorbike and songthaew?
4. Is any sin sot required?
This is a traditional payment from the husband to the wife’s parents. The amount varies. My wife and her parents made it clear that they expect nothing. Of course I’ve already shown over the past 7 years that I can take care of her and our daughter. Some families see sin sot as a substantial requirement and will require half a million or more Thai baht. Others, are fine with 50,000 THB or 100,000 THB. Others won’t ask for anything at all.
5. What will your wife and her family expect from you after you marry?
Make sure you find out about the needs her family has once she marries you. Some families see a farang joining the family and think you are a bank to loan and give money freely to family members. If your wife feels the same way, you’re going to have a hell of a time fending off requests.
There IS a cultural requirement for sons and daughters to support their parents as the parents are too old or not fit, or willing to work. Find out what might be required to give her parents. It might be substantial – 20,000 THB or more per month. It might be 5,000 or 10,000 THB per month. If your wife is working too – she might just give that money to her parents without any discussion with you because it’s the normal, right thing to do in her culture.
You will need to talk about everything so it’s all out in the open. This is a major area of disagreement for many couples – and the only way to resolve it is to give something. We used to give my wife’s parents 5,000 THB per month, but now that her mom is living with us – we give her 3,000 THB per month. She’s quite happy with that.
Will your wife expect you to give her money every month? Whether she is working or not – she might think that she should be entitled to money from you each month. Get that ironed out.
6. Will her parents move in with you at some point? When?
7. Talk about all the expenses of living in Thailand. There is car insurance (cheap) and health insurance (cheap too, but on the order of 40,000 THB per year for you and her and a child). Car payments. Gas. Rent. Cable TV. Internet. Travel to or from your home country. Monthly support to her parents. Dining out money. Taxes. Etc.
8. Will you have children?
Most Thai women want kids. How many kids, and when?
9. If you’re planning on living in Thailand – can you stay full-time?
Or, will you need to return to your home country and work for some months before you can return? Will this be ongoing, or a one-time thing?
10. Does anyone have a gambling problem in her family?
Gambling in Thailand, and all Asian countries is a special problem. It’s a huge social problem and I know many friends that have been affected by it. Not that they were gamblers, no, but their wife or someone in the family was – and these guys ended up paying part or all of the gambling debts for the family members. In one case a female teacher from the UK married a Thai guy in Isaan – also a teacher. She bought them a new house. He was a gambler. He got some lump sums of cash to gamble – using the house as collateral. He lost the bets, and they both lost the house. This was in the course of just 18 months after she married.
Gambling is a horrible thing in Thailand – and you need to make it crystal clear to your wife – that if someone is in trouble for debts – that it is their own trouble, not yours. You’re not bailing anybody out for any amount of money.
Likewise, set the stage for what you will or won’t loan out or give out money for. Maybe in 3 years your new wife will let you know her mom needs an addition to her house. Talk about it now – whether that will ever be a possibility or not. In our family – I give out nothing to relatives, that includes my wife’s brother, except the monthly payment to her mom. Her mom has no expenses, she can save 30,000 THB per year if she wanted to (and she does). Anyway, get it all straightened out about money before it becomes a problem because it WILL become a problem.
Free eBook - How to Find a Good Thai Wife in Thailand (Pt 3)
There have been some horrible stories of girls that were trafficked into prostitution or used as drug runners for guys that find them in Thailand and promise them a better life in their foreign country. Many Thai girls wonât consider leaving Thailand anymore. You can hardly blame them.
So, this will be another factor youâll need to consider in your hunt for the ultimate Thai wife for yourself. Does the girl even want to move away from Thailand? Could you convince her that her life would be better in your country?
Getting back to language. If you are serious about taking a Thai bride, you will learn basic Thai. Thatâs our own prejudice about the subject I guess. Learning English is just as difficult for Thais, and maybe â probably â more so than it will be for you to learn Thai. If your plan is to live in Thailand with your new Thai wife â it only makes sense to learn Thai, and learn it to a basic, or just beyond basic, level. Once you have the basics down, and live in the country for a number of months or years, you can decide if you want to keep learning Thai to higher and higher levels.
Personally, I didnât see the need for it. I can speak Thai on a basic level â to anyone, and Iâm understood maybe 90% of the time. There are many things I miss in conversation, but, once you speak at a basic level â Thais just overlook whatever you donât understand. They are usually just amazed that you can talk to them at all. If you are not working with Thais and need to know high-level Thai â there doesnât seem to be much point in learning it at that level. I know very few foreigners that can speak Thai at any sort of meaningful level, and very few foreigners that want to. Up to you â as they say here often. You might see a need for it, or you might not.
What are some good online resources for learning Thai?
WomenLearningThai.com â Catherine has some language tips, and a lot of resources to help people start out learning this difficult language.
Thai-Language.com â a free site with a lot of practice exercises.
Learn-Thai-Podcast.com â a pay site to help you learn the Thai language. This site popped up a few years ago, it was created by a guy in his 30âs that lives in Europe and that has a wife from Thailand to help him with the lessons. Quite a good way to learn Thai.
YouTube.com/user/learningthai â same business as above, but these are some free lessons they put on YouTube.
ThaiPod101.com â another good site.
YouTube.com/user/ThaiPod101 â the business above also has some free YouTube videos.
RosettaStone.com â has an excellent Thai learning course that some find easy because it drills it into your head. I used this before I came to Thailand and it did help. I wasnât an avid student though.
Pimsleur Thai â this is an audio course that you can find for learning simple or advanced Thai. Their website is: PimsleurDigital.com. They have 30 half-hour lessons on audio for $120. I have gone through the first 6 audio mp3âs and found it helpful, but Iâd probably be inclined to use something with photos, videos or other interactive learning tool as well as plain audio. The Rosetta Stone course would be the first one Iâd try if I was going to pay online for something. Learn-Thai-Podcast.com would be the second thing Iâd try.
Of course the best resource for learning Bangkok Thai will be to find a native Thai speaker in your town that can help you. Youâll need to pay them, of course, but you couldnât do better than finding a real person to help you learn this difficult language.
How long will you need to spend learning Thai before you can communicate enough to come to Thailand and find your own Thai wife?
It really depends entirely on you. Weâve seen people learn basic Thai in 3 months, here in Thailand where they could practice a lot. If youâre here in the country it will be much easier for you to learn Thai if you just insist on not speaking English âand practicing your Thai daily. Three months might be enough if youâre immersed in it. For me, myself, I studied diligently on my own for a year, giving myself 1,500 note-cards of Thai vocabulary, and practicing speaking with people I met at the stores, post office, bank, friends, and strangers. I still didnât know much Thai at the end of a year â and that was living here. I am definitely language learning challenged (slow), you might say!
How will you know youâve learned enough Thai to be able to come and find a Thai wife?
As a minimum you should know all the basic vocabulary â colors, days of week, months, time, places, directions, food of all sorts, items you use daily like table, plate, forks, car, taxi. You should be able to ask the woman about her life â where she grew up, about her family â what do they do? Where did she go to school? What does she like to do? What does she want for the future? You know what youâd need to ask her before you feel comfortable enough and safe enough to marry her.
Some guys wouldnât require much more than what I mentioned above. Hell, some of you would just check for a pulse, make sure sheâs presentable, and give her a ring.
Be honest! If thatâs all you need â you might be able to find a Thai girl that speaks English well enough to communicate with â but, you shouldnât rely on it. Youâll be spending money everyday youâre in Thailand looking for a wife, and you can really maximize your chances by learning as much Thai as you can before you arrive.
Another Option to Learning Thai
Pay someone to translate between English and Thai for you, and take that person around with you on your wife hunt.
There are some benefits to this approach, and some drawbacks. First the benefits.
You can leave for Thailand as soon as you find someone to translate for you, or, you could even come first and find a translator when you arrive. Ideally you would find someone online that can help you find a Thai wife and negotiate a price for your adventure. Tell the person everything that would be required â that you will be traveling for a couple of weeks and your one goal is to find a Thai woman to marry and live with here in Thailand or to take home with you after getting married in Thailand, or getting a fiancÃ© visa to visit your country and having the wedding there.
You could probably expect to pay about 1,000 Thai Baht per day for someone to translate for you. In addition, especially if it was a female â you would need to get her a separate hotel room and for anyone you hire, take care of buying all food and transportation costs. Iâll go over the total expected costs you might face later in the book.
Once you have either learned Thai well enough to talk with potential wives, or you have found someone that can translate everything for you â you can book your ticket to arrive in Thailand, or, if youâre already here â get started ASAP.
Free Thai Girls eBook - How to Find a Good Thai Wife in Thailand (Pt 2)
Finding a good Thai wife in Thailand – home to millions of available women, is not as easy as it might seem at first glance.
Some Barriers to Finding a Good Thai Wife in Thailand:
- avoiding prostitutes
- avoiding money-grabbers
- some Thai women wouldn’t consider a foreigner for marriage
- some women are already married – but, won’t tell you
These are just some things that quickly come to mind. There are more.
The language barrier is huge. Learning Thai is no small feat, and those expats that do learn how to speak Thai well are either quite talented at acquiring language, or they practiced a lot.
For an adult man from another country to come to Thailand and try repeatedly to pronounce simple words – takes a level of effort that few can continually muster. Same for Thai women learning to speak English. Though Thais’ have English taught in school from an early age, most of them don’t speak beyond a very basic few common words – hello; oh my god; thank you; how are you today; teacher; etc. Colors, body parts, and sometimes days of the week is about all you’ll get out of most Thai women.
Thais are very cautious of putting themselves out there by attempting to speak English, and being wrong – repeatedly. Most won’t do it. This is one of the major factors contributing to Thais’ weak language acquisition skills – whatever language they are learning. It hurts too much (read about “Thai face”) publicly to say something incorrect over and over.
How to get over the language barrier?
I think we’re safe in saying, the language barrier is the biggest hurdle to clear. After all, if you could speak Thai you might not even be reading this book at all. You’d go to non-bargirl type places and start talking to Thai girls. Thai women are easy to talk to, and whether they return your conversation out of interest or politeness, they are still talking to you.
There are just two ways you can clear up the language barrier…
1. Learn Thai language to a degree that will enable you to talk with many girls in Thailand.
2. Employ someone that speaks English and Thai and that can (and will) translate correctly between you and Thai women.
We’ll cover both. Ideally you will make the effort to learn Thai sufficiently enough to come to Thailand and talk to a lot of girls privately and find one that you click with enough to marry. If you hire someone – you can accomplish the task much quicker and yet unless the girl speaks English quite well to start with – there is probably a lot being lost in translation. What happens once you move in together and neither of you speaks the other language? Like two mimes talking to each other. One of you should learn. Take it upon yourself to get started, unless you don’t plan on living in Thailand after you marry.
Learning Thai in your home country (if that is where you are now), to a degree that will enable you to come to Thailand and talk to the local women will take a lot of time. Finding a girl you like, trust, and want to marry – and that wants to marry you - will take a lot of time.
If you studied Thai for 1-2 hours each day, perhaps in a year you might be able to come to Thailand and give it a shot. Learning Thai is not easy. It’s frustrating. It’s one of the hardest languages to learn, if English is your native language. There is very little cross-over.
You know how words in English sometimes sound like words in French, German, Spanish, or Dutch because the languages all came from Latin? In Thailand that never happens, unless the word used is the same. There are a couple hundred words that Thais have adopted and use – that are the same as English words. They are not pronounced the same, often times, but, the word is supposed to be the same. “Inter” is one. It means, international.
Some others are:
- plastic bag
- 7-11 (seven)
- apple (Thais say appun – pronouncing the final L sound as N usually)
- ball (bon)
Learning Thai in your country, assuming there are Thais in the city you live in that can teach you Thai – can be difficult for another reason.
Language differences between the areas of Thailand. There are numerous dialects – and they are different enough from each other that you’ll be lost knowing one, and trying to talk to someone from another. My wife (I’m married to a great Thai girl) comes from the northeastern province of Sisaket, in the northeast of Thailand. She learned the Isaan (northeastern) Thai dialect, as well as “Bangkok Thai”. When she is outside Isaan, she will likely speak Bangkok Thai because nobody will understand her, unless they also learned Isaan Thai.
When we moved from Isaan to southern Thailand, where they speak with a southern dialect – she was lost. She couldn’t understand our waitresses, our taxi drivers, our neighbors. I remember having waitresses come to our table and say something – and she and I both looked at each other like – WHAT DID SHE JUST SAY? In the south they shorten EVERYTHING and they speak with little to no intonation. No rising and falling tones at all. It’s flat. It is tough to distinguish the consonants too – but the vowels are much more clearly spoken. Southern Thais’ speak very fast too… so it often sounds like “Whaaaahhhawwaaoooowwwaaaa Wah?”
Not joking, it is that bad.
So, what will you learn? Chiang Mai Thai? Isaan Thai? Bangkok Thai? Southern Thai? Deep South Thai?
Just learn Bangkok Thai. Insist on it. Don’t learn Isaan because you want to be one of the in-group when, or if you ever make it up there. People in Isaan will love you – but, elsewhere you’ll just be someone that Thais don’t want to talk to. There is some taboo about learning Isaan Thai as a foreigner. Typically, foreigners in the country learn Isaan Thai because they learn it in the bars in Pattaya, Bangkok, and Patong Beach. Thais cringe when they hear it, and they instantly associate you spending your vacations in bars when you come to visit Thailand.
You won’t impress anyone outside Isaan by knowing Isaan Thai – so, don’t bother. Learn some words – sure. It’s great to know some Laotian too, which the Isaan people really love. If you know some Laotian words – you’ll be treated very well in Isaan.
Learning Bangkok Thai ensures that you can communicate with most of the people in the country. There are girls without basic high school education that don’t know Bangkok Thai, but, probably you wouldn’t be interested in taking them for a wife either. Not that there aren’t great Thai girls without education, but, your chance of having a successful marriage probably drops if you find someone that hasn’t completed high school.
Don’t you think? We’re guessing here – it seems to make sense, but we could be wrong.
So, ideally, you would find someone to teach you Bangkok Thai in your home country. That might prove difficult to find someone to teach you, or it might be an awesome way to get to know not only the language, but the country through the eyes of someone that grew up there. You would have the opportunity to ask the person teaching you – many things about Thai culture and living. It might also help you decide whether or not you could live in Thailand full-time, once you do find the right girl to marry. Many Thai women don’t want to leave Thailand for foreign places.
Free Thai Girls eBook - How to Find a Good Thai Wife in Thailand (Pt 1)
Originally we put this at Amazon, let it sit there for 4 days, and it sold one copy. Apparently not many people searching Amazon for this topic… or, Amazon may have had it in the wrong categories, or whatever. We decided to yank it from Amazon, and give it away here for free.
This is not the definitive guide on finding a Thai girl to marry. There are many Thai girl - farang marriages each year, and they all do it their own way. This is one way you might go about it. This is broken down into sections, and at the bottom of this post will be a link to the next section.
How to Find a Good Thai Wife to Marry in Thailand
Written by Mark Deemis.
Â©2011 Mark Deemis. All rights reserved.
This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be resold, nor may any portion of it be copied, printed, or reproduced in any format without express written permission from the author. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.
This book was written for men that would like to find a Thai woman for a wife, and donât have any good plan for how to make that happen - without finding a prostitute in a bar.
Weâll give you a few different ways you can come to Thailand and find a bride. There are easy ways, and more difficult ways. There are ways that involve spending more money than others. There are some very cheap options. Youâll choose whatever makes more sense to you.
Itâs our hope that you are able to find a Thai wife in 30 days of looking, but you might have to come back a couple times to make that happen. IF you give it your best shot the first time â it just might be possible. I think some of you will pull it off. Weâll give you all the help we can â and the rest is, of course, up to you.
If you attempt to follow the tips in this book and come to Thailand to find your bride-to-be and realize at some point youâre not going to pull it off without some big help â write us and weâll see if we can meet with you and help. This is the most expensive way to go about it â but still, pretty damn reasonable considering youâre looking for a good girl to spend the rest of your life with and maybe to raise your children.
Though some guys seem content enough to date and get married to Thai women that once sold themselves to anyone with 500 THB, this book isnât about that, or weâd have named it, âFind a Wife in Bangkok 35 Minutes After Leaving the Airport.â You donât need a book for that. Book a plane ticket to Bangkok and hit Nana Plaza, Soi Cowboy, or head over to Pattaya or down to Patong Beach, sit in the bars and tell girls you are looking for a bride.
Maybe there is nothing easier (or more ridiculous) than finding your new Thai bride this way. Many guys have done it, maybe you have already done it and are now reading this book so you can try again to find a woman youâll have a better chance at success with this time.
What is a âgood Thai woman for marriageâ?
Letâs clarify what weâre talking about here. Essentially, for us â after much discussion, we came up with the idea that a good Thai woman for marriage is one that would make a good partner for you and a good mother for your children. Most Thai women under 35 are interested in having children. You may or may not be interested, but you may have kids whether you want them or not â at some point down the road.
A good Thai partner is not someone that was a prostitute before. Chances are.Â You can have prostitutes as friends. You can have sex with prostitutes â weâre not judging, and quite frankly â weâve been there. Again, and again. Knowing Thai girls that work in âThe Businessâ of taking cash for sex â we couldnât imagine that a guy would choose a girl that has worked in âThe Industryâ to marry. Itâs beyond us. We donât want any of our readers to fall into this bottomless pit of problems. If you donât necessarily care â this isnât the book for you. There is a small window of time for you to get a refund with Amazon â get your refund now!
A good Thai woman for marriage is someone that may be the mother of your children. The absolute bottom line is â who in the world would want the mother of their kids to be an ex-whore that worked the streets or in a soapy â in Pattaya?
There are many guys out there that donât give it much thought.
Iâve been interested in this topic for years â how to help guys that currently live overseas or even right here in Thailand, to find a good wife. There is a lot of interest in the topic. One time on a website I wrote an article about the topic and I offered to help guys find a good Thai woman for a wife for $5,000 USD plus expenses of traveling around with him â and talking to many potential girls to find âthe oneâ. I wrote the article just to gauge interest. I was very surprised that there were guys interested in a customized service like this.
I didnât have time to start a business like that, and to my knowledge no such thing exists in Thailand even now â years later. It should exist â some of you would no doubt use it. Some enterprising expat is going to figure out that a lot of money can be made in this area, and is going to make a small fortune at it. Maybe it will be you as soon as you figure out the process. This book outlines everything I (we) know about the subject, and with our combined 21 years of living in Thailand and speaking Thai â we think we have some good ideas here. Heck, for $2.99 you are getting much of what we know after 21 years of living life in this country. Not a bad dealâ¦ Â We hope you enjoy reading it half as much as we enjoyed writing it.
Most of you probably have good ideas about how to start looking for a good girl in Thailand â you just lack the background knowledge to get it done. There are many websites you can go to that will give you half-an-idea about how to find a good Thai girl.
Thatâs a good start, and a piece of the puzzle, but putting it all together is what weâve attempted here. I have never seen anything resembling a step-by-step guide to finding a good Thai girl in Thailand to take as a bride. This book is not the perfect solution for everybody, but, by the time you are finished reading it â you should be able to create a simple plan of attack of your own â using what you learned â and be able to find a great Thai wife in Thailand within a year.
I (along with my esteemed colleague, Steve) will attempt in forty-one pages to give you a plan of attack to follow so you can find a lovely, good, Thai woman in Thailand to marry.
There is no one way to do this. There are many ways you could go about it. We lead you through some of them, and give you as much help as possible, so you can complete your mission.